vivdunstan

Got this late afternoon in Dundee city centre. I am still offered these Covid vaccines twice yearly by the NHS, being severely immunosuppressed. Very quiet vaccine centre - no one waiting when I got there early. I suspect they have a lot of no shows in the current 75+ group. I was weeks earlier for my vaccine than I might have been, keen to get it before my Capercaillie music concert in 3 weeks.

Because I was seen so early we were able to get an early takeaway dinner from a fab fish and chip shop that is sadly shutting its Dundee branch after this weekend. Sat below the uni, overlooking the River Tay to Fife. Bright evening sunshine, and surrounded by optimistic but unsuccessful seagulls. Martin also spotted wild bunnies on the grass down the steps, so dashed down to photograph them.

Planning a very quiet weekend. I expect to be feverish and very sore overnight. More seriously I will probably have a 3 month long flare in my autoimmune brain disease, starting about a week from now. It’s very difficult. But I will be protected.

Pleased that my temperature has stabilised finally 6 days after my latest double vaccines. It's continued swinging for ages, though I was feeling much less fragile overall by Monday afternoon. My arms are still sore, but improving a lot too. Enormously grateful to have got my protection. Even as I expect a very nasty and prolonged post Covid vaccine auto immune neurological illness flare to start shortly 🙁 But got my protection!

I'm trying to remember to make time for this each week. To randomly draw a simple past/present/future 3-card spread of the Urban Crow oracle cards which I got recently. And find very easy to work with/interpret.

As usual, I'm using them as a tool to reflect on my situation and circumstances. And think about where I am and what I want to do. I am not using them in a predictive kind of way.

Here is today's spread. With thoughts/comments after the picture.



The middle card, Freedom, was lovely to see. I am currently newly in a better patch in between my recurring rollercoaster of post Covid vaccine neurological autoimmune disease flares. I've had these flares 9 times now, after every Covid vaccine (I get, and need, a lot of Covid vaccines because I am severely immunosuppressed). Each time I am even more ill for up to 3 months, with phenomenally increased sedation, headaches, arm and leg loss of control, and increased bladder incontinence. Many people wouldn't put up with this. But I'm not willing to sacrifice my much needed Covid vaccine protection. And I know I am generating good antibodies from each one.

So I'm in a better patch, for the next couple of months. After that I will get my 10th Covid vaccine, and be iller again for another 3 months. I will just cope. Plus my neurological disease is still progressing, and leaves me severely disabled, even in the better patches. But that progression is slow. And that's partly why I'm still here 30 years into living with this illness!

So yes, this is a time of relative freedom for me, and I want to make the most of it. Maybe get more things done, including the academic journal papers and research projects I am working on sporadically. And maybe get out more with Martin, to have fun.

The left card, reflecting the past, is Anomaly, which can be a problem, or something out of the ordinary, or other interpretations. It's making me think of my latest Covid vaccine flare more than my long-term neurological disease. A devastating neurological flare which has run from early May to early August. And it does tie in with Freedom.

The rightmost card, reflecting looking ahead, is Caching. Which again fits nicely with where I am. I want, in this short better patch, to make new valuable memories, and get things done I can look back on in future. So I want to make the most of this time, in a way I can look back on happily when I'm much iller again.

An interesting draw anyway, and some nice things to think about.

Meanwhile re Freedom, today is the start of the Glasgow Worldcon, and I have digital streaming access thanks to my attending ticket. I won't be watching much live, but hope to see one talk later today. And catch up on even more in the coming weeks and months. I also have Oxonmoot to look forward to in a few weeks. Again with a digital ticket. And ditto for the Edinburgh Book Festival. Streaming has been transformational for me.

Liking this BBC article a lot. Living with an auto immune disease my immune system is trying to kill me. It is dangerously over active. But I still get people suggesting things to “boost” it. Which is a load of nonsense generally, but in the rare cases it can make a difference can be downright dangerous for people like me. I’d love to have a nicely balanced immune system. As it is I’m kept alive by drugs that suppress the bad bits but also the rest. That’s why I’m at increased risk of infections, including very dangerous ones like Covid. But the last thing I want to do is boost me back up. My life saving drugs are doing what they need to do to keep me alive. I let them get on with it, and stay as safe as I can.